Useless

For the Time Being

2009-08-09T20:41:00.000-07:00

By Norman Fischer
http://happydays.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/08/07/for-the-time-being/

I recently returned from a week-long Zen meditation retreat on the Puget Sound. I am a Zen Buddhist priest, so a meditation retreat isn’t exotic to me: it’s what I do. But this one was particularly delightful. Sixty-five of us in silence together for a week, as great blue herons winged slowly overhead, swallows darted low to the ground before us as we walked quietly on the open grassy space between the meditation hall and the dining room. Rabbits nibbled on tall grasses in the thicket by the lake. The sky that far north is glorious this time of year, full of big bright clouds that can be spectacular at sunset — which doesn’t happen until around 10 p.m., the sky ablaze over the tops of the many islands thereabouts.

So yes, it was peaceful, it was quiet, it was beautiful, and nice to be away from all telephones and computers, all tasks and ordinary demands, all talking, all purposeful activity. The retreat participants are busy people like everyone else, and they appreciated the silence, the natural surroundings, and the chance to do nothing but experience their lives in the simplest possible way.

As most people know, a Zen meditation retreat is not a vacation. Despite the silence and the beauty, despite the respite from the busyness, the experience can be grueling. The meditation practice is intense and relentless, the feeling in the hall rigorous and disciplined. We start pretty early in the morning and meditate all day long, into the late evening. It can be uncomfortable physically and emotionally. And some people find it hard not to talk at all for a week. So, what’s in it for them?

If you live long enough you will discover the great secret we all hate to admit: life is inherently tough. Difficult things happen. You lose your job or your money or your spouse. You get old, you get sick, you die You slog through your days beleaguered and reactive even when there are no noticeable disasters — a normal day has its many large and small annoyances, and the world, if you care to notice, and it is difficult not to, is burning.

Life is a challenge and in the welter of it all it is easy to forget who you are. Decades go by. Finally something happens. Or maybe nothing does. But one day you notice that you are suddenly lost, miles away from home, with no sense of direction. And you don’t know what to do.

The people at the retreat were not in crisis — at least no more than anyone else. I know most of them pretty well. They are people who have made the practice of Zen meditation a regular part of their daily routine, and come here not to forget about their troubles and pressures, but for the opposite reason: to meet them head on, to digest and clarify them. Why would they want to do this? Because it turns out that facing pain — not denial, not running in the opposite direction — is a practical necessity.

This week I talked about time, using as my text the 13th century Zen Master Dogen’s famous essay “The Time Being,” a treatise on the religious dimension of time.

Dogen’s view is uncannily close to Heidegger’s: being is always and only being in time; time is nothing other than being. This turns out to be less a philosophical than an experiential fact: to really live is to accept that you live “for the time being,” and to fully enter that moment of time. Living is that, not building up an identity or a set of accomplishments or relationships, though of course we do that too. But primarily, fundamentally, to live is to embrace each moment as if it were the first, last, and all moments of time. Whether you like this moment or not is not the point: in fact liking it or not liking it, being willing or unwilling to accept it, depending on whether or not you like it, is to sit on the fence of your life, waiting to decide whether or not to live, and so never actually living. I find it impressive how thoroughly normal it is be so tentative about the time of our lives, or so asleep within it, that we miss it entirely. Most of us don’t know what it actually feels like to be alive. We know about our problems, our desires, our goals and accomplishments, but we don’t know much about our lives. It generally takes a huge event, the equivalent or a birth or a death, to wake up our sense of living this moment we are given – this moment that is just for the time being, because it passes even as it arrives. Meditation is feeling the feeling of being alive for the time being. Life is more poignant than we know.

Dogen writes, “For the time being the highest peak, for the time being the deepest ocean; for the time being a crazy mind, for the time being a Buddha body; for the time being a Zen Master, for the time being an ordinary person; for the time being earth and sky… Since there is nothing but this moment, ‘for the time being’ is all the time there is.”

For seven days that week I spoke about this in as many ways as I could think of, silly and sometimes not silly, and for seven days 65 silent people listened and took Dogen’s words to heart.

We want enjoyment, we want to avoid pain and discomfort. But it is impossible that things will always work out, impossible to avoid pain and discomfort. So to be happy, with a happiness that doesn’t blow away with every wind, we need to be able to make use of what happens to us — all of it — whether we find ourselves at the top of a mountain or at the bottom of the sea.

Enjoy The Effort No Matter What The Effect

2009-08-09T20:26:00.000-07:00

Swami Sukhabodhananda

We have many desires and targets. We dont always get what we want. Some of us are happy with what we get, and others remain dissatisfied. Still others dont give up; they keep trying. Which approach would be the right one
I will recommend another approach. You can have a desire. Put in your best effort to fulfil it. But make sure you enjoy the effort rather than its fruits. There are those who make the effort grumbling and are happy only when the desire is achieved. There are others who exhaust themselves making the effort to such a degree that they have no strength or enthusiasm left to enjoy the fruit. My method is: Enjoy the effort no matter what the effect.
My approach is to celebrate the march towards the destination . If the destination is reached, we will be happy. Even if it is not reached, nobody can take away the sense of thrill at having run the race, the delicious fatigue felt along the whole body. My happiness is derived not from reaching a goal, but from the struggle i wage as part of my attempt at reaching it. I am engaged in talking to you now. Suppose i feel i will be happy only if you give me a thundering ovation when i conclude my lecture. That means i am not fully enjoying my teaching, rather, my mind is set on a particular goal. That very concern may prevent me from giving my best to my teaching and thus act as a barrier to my attaining the goal.
Playing football is one kind of joy, winning is another kind. The problem is we identify joy exclusively with winning. Classical musicians are so absorbed in their performance that for all practical purposes, they are unmindful of the audience, the applause at climactic points, or the money they will receive from the organisers at the end. What they enjoy is their involvement in bringing their art alive, not the end result in the form of ovation or payment. So enjoy the process. Enjoy the travel. Enjoy the endeavour.
Ensure that you will be working smart, not just hard. Dont go fishing in the bathtub. Dont try to work up lather in a running stream. Instead, fish in a stream, and work up lather in a bathtub. Set and evaluate your goals, estimate the quantum and quality of efforts to be invested in attaining the goals, calculate the ROI (return on investment) quotient carefully, and then, if you are convinced the ratio is as satisfactory, go ahead and work towards your goals. That is smart work, intelligent effort. Failure is a fact of life. In all competitive contexts as in sports, for example, one side has to lose. So why not enjoy the effort rather than exult at success or mope at failure I think it is better mental discipline to celebrate the successes rather than brood on the losses. It is definitely a healthier strategy for the future for anyone wishing to continue in competitive endeavours.
There is also a spiritual lesson in every failure. Failures are necessary to remind people of their essential human vulnerabilities . An unbroken string of successes can create pride and a sense of invincibility about oneself in a high achiever. Remember the bragging, I am the greatest that comes out of the mouths of wrestlers and boxing stars As the common maxim goes, such pride always precedes a great fall. Surrendering to the Lord is an act of bhakti devotion, and surrender happens only in a spirit of humility.

Going through suffering in anticipation of joy

2009-05-23T13:09:00.000-07:00

source : http://swamisukhabhodananda.org

Religion

2009-01-06T06:31:00.001-08:00

'Spirituality is a particular term which actually means: a dealing with intuition. In the theistic tradition there is a notion of clinging [to] a word. A certain act is regarded as displeasing to a divine principle; a certain act is regarded as pleasing the divine ... whatever. In the tradition of non-theism however it is very direct - that the case histories are not particularly important. What is actually important is here and now. Now is definitely now. We try to experience what is available there ... on the spot. There's no point in us thinking that a past did exist that we could have now. This is now. This very moment. Nothing mystical, just 'now', very simple, straightforward. And from that now-ness, however, arises a sense of intelligence always that you are constantly interacting with reality one by one. Spot by spot. Constantly. We actually experience fantastic precision always. But we are threatened by the now so we jump to the past or the future. Paying attention to the materials that exist in our life - such rich life that we lead - all these choices take place all the time ... but none of them are regarded as bad or good per se - everything we experience are unconditional experiences. They don't come along with a label saying 'this is regarded as bad' or 'this is good'. But we experience them but we don't actually pay heed to them properly. We don't actually regard that we are going somewhere. We regard that as a hassle. Waiting to be dead. That is a problem. And that is not trusting the now-ness properly. What is actually experienced now possesses a lot of powerful things. It is so powerful that we can't face it. Therefore we have to borrow from the past and invite the future all the time. And maybe that's why we seek religion. Maybe that's why we march in the street. Maybe that's why we complain to society. Maybe that's why we vote for the presidents. It's quite ironical ... very funny indeed.'

-Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche

Keep It Simple And You’ll Be Happy(Dada J P Vaswani)

2008-08-03T00:10:00.000-07:00

How many gadgets modern technology has blessed us with! Yet, they only seem to add to the stress and tension of our lives. I have seen young men and women walk down parks and green lanes with earphones completely shutting out the world of beauty around them.
Keep it simple! That is the mantra which can help you reduce stress and tension. Possessions and acquisitions may seem marvellous. But after a while, you do not own them, they own you.
A Tao story tells us of an artist who was so gifted that his fame spread all over. One day, he painted the picture of a snake. It was so lifelike that viewers seemed to hear it hiss!
The artist was so carried away by his own success and the adulation of his fans that he touched up the snake. He made its eyes glow; he outlined the fangs so that they seemed to dart at you! He could not stop; he went on and painted feet on the snake!
The expression, “Painting feet on a snake”, a Chinese saying, refers to situations that are needlessly made more complicated by people who do not know when and where to stop.
When our life becomes complicated with power and possessions, we move farther and farther away from the simple joys and pleasures of life. We fail to notice the green grass and the fresh morning flowers.
We don’t have time to hear birds singing or watch our little ones smiling. We drift away from the state of childlike innocence and simple joy, which is our basic nature.
Simplicity is not self-denial. It is a return to those values that matter most in life. It emphasises spontaneity and intuition. It helps us to rediscover the feeling of wonder and joy that we have lost as adults.
There was a wealthy businessman, who was also a sincere, simple soul. He owned an expensive jet in which he flew about from place to place. They asked him if he enjoyed his private plane. His reply was significant. He said it was certainly very convenient; but he had managed to travel without his own plane earlier; in fact, when he was young and poor, the fact that he couldn’t fly did not stop him from being happy.
A famous actress was being interviewed on television. She had made a fortune that year, over a billion dollars. “Does it make you feel good?” she was asked. “Yes and no,” she replied thoughtfully. “Everyone thinks it’s marvellous. So many people flock around me. But i really do not know who my true friends are and who are with me only for the money and the glamour. As for my daily life, it has not changed much, except that i work harder now.”
A group of young men and women were walking across a shopping mall. They were happy and relaxed; they were talking and laughing merrily. Not a care in the world did they seem to have.
There was a young girl among them, who happened to glance at the window of a jewellery store which they passed. On display was a beautiful, brilliant diamond bracelet. How it sparkled and shone! The girl’s eyes opened wide. She went close to the window to inspect the price. She could not afford it.
She caught up with her friends but she was not the happy, laughing, bubbly girl that she had been five minutes earlier. Her cheerful, buoyant attitude had been replaced by a mood of glum disappointment.
This is the worst part about wanting things. Getting them may give you momentary happiness. But not being able to get them often makes you miserable!

Needs and desires

2008-05-03T08:33:00.000-07:00

Making a distinction between needs and desires, here Amrit Sadhana explains that when the body seeks something, it is need and when the mind wants, it is desire

We all know that craving for “a little more” — whether having the last spoon of Ice cream or the last sip of Coke, the mind says, have a little more. The stomach immediately says, “Enough” but the mind says, “It is so tasty! Have some more.” When the body gets thirsty, it never asks for Coca Cola, it is happy with a glass of water. But the mind is not satisfied with just water. When the body wants something, it is need, when the mind wants it is desire. The Osho sutra says : “When need and desire both disappear, time disappears. And remember to make a distinction between desire and need; otherwise you can be in a very deep mess. “We are already in a mess. We try to drop needs and never try to curb desires. People fast for days, and desire for heaven. Fasting is cutting the need and desiring heaven is helping desire to grow. Some Osho tips to restore the balance :
Stop when the need stops; Watch where the desire starts. Make it a continuous awareness. If you can make the distinction, you have attained something — a clue to existence. Need is beautiful, desire is ugly. Remember, it is easy to drop needs, because body is so silent you can torture it. Dropping needs is going against nature. What do you need? Food, water, a shelter, somebody to love you and somebody you can love. Desires are useless and foolish. What is a desire? It is not a desire of shelter. Desire is always for a better shelter. Desire is comparative, need is simple. You need a shelter, desire needs a palace. You need a woman to love, a man to love. But desire needs a Cleopatra. Desire is for the impossible; need is for the possible. Cut desires and become aware. Then you will be beyond time. Desires create time; if you cut desires you will be beyond time. Having no desire is transcending the mind.

--link

What is true maturity?

2008-04-27T11:59:00.000-07:00

Maturity is the ability to relate appropriately to other realities than one’s own. It is never-ending, says Swami Kriyananda

Surely it is self-evident that in the way we raise our children, we should lead them somewhere. Where, then, should we lead them? Isn’t the simple, obvious answer: from immaturity to maturity? What, then, is maturity? Let me propose a definition: Maturity is the ability to relate appropriately to other realities than one’s own. Immaturity is a child throwing a tantrum because he can’t get what he wants. Children discover as they grow up that life isn’t always disposed to comply with their wishes. The process of growing up is one of learning to “play the odds” — to adapt to situations as they are, and not as one wishes they were. Immature people typically decry such adaptation as “compromise”. Many people mature a little, but not much, beyond the child with his temper tantrums. Much might have been accomplished during the time they were growing up to cure them of this infantilism. Instead, the very dogmas of our times feed their immaturity instead of curing it. Not long ago, during an economic recession in America, many hundreds of workers in the city of Detroit, Michigan lost their jobs. A considerable number were given psychiatric counselling to help them adjust. There were too many cases, however, to make this counselling available to everyone. Interestingly, those who were given counselling had a notably more difficult time adjusting to their new circumstances. How to explain these results? The report said that the “beneficiaries” of counselling were encouraged to dwell on their predicament, and to consider various theoretical means of coping with it. Those who missed the opportunity for counselling wasted no time in theorizing. They accepted reality as it presented itself to them, and set themselves to rebuilding their lives. Maturity is not a finishing line reached automatically at a certain age. It is a neverending-process. We sail towards expansive horizons of awareness until we find infinity.

What do you do when you do?(PARAMAHAMSA SRI NITHYANANDA)

2008-04-07T10:02:00.001-07:00

Psychologists say that a person living in western countries never sleeps for more than 14 minutes at a stretch - more often it is less. After 14 minutes he comes back to the dream state or wakeful consciousness or just floats in the dream level. Again he goes back to sleep for a maximum of 14 minutes. Then he comes back to the dream level. Again he goes back to sleep. They call this the rapid eye movement or REM sleep pattern.

You never sleep totally even when you sleep. There are levels of mind in which you will never have dreams. You never need to have any dreams. You can directly enter into deep sleep, if you know how to live in the now, the present moment.
If you know how to live in now, you will know the art of eating, the art of sleeping, and the art of doing everything. That is the art of living.

Can you try to remember one incident from your day in complete detail? You are more dead than alive even when you are awake. You almost live like a man in half sleep. You do things without fully knowing what you do. You do recall brushing your teeth; but do you remember the sensation of cold water in your mouth? Do you remember the feel of the taste of the toothpaste in your mouth or the pressure of your toothbrush upon your gums? And how did you feel after brushing? Or how was the water being poured on your body in the shower? How did the whole thing happen? What is happening after you have eaten your food? Look at your life; look at your face; you are all almost bored. Somehow you are pulling along. Life is just a drag. Why? Because, all you do, all that you know to do for everything is how to postpone. Your mind never sits with your being. Your mind never lives in the same moment that you are in. You are always in the space of tomorrow or in the space of yesterday. It is never in the space of today, now, the present.

Live in the present. This is the secret art of living.

Of Goodness, Intimacy and True Sharing(Swami Sukhabodhananda)

2008-04-07T09:57:00.000-07:00

A crow found a piece of meat. The moment it picked up the meat, the other crows and eagles began chasing it. The crow soared higher and higher to safeguard the meat. The others chased it relentlessly. Then, suddenly, the crow dropped the meat; the crows and eagles left the chase, and dived towards the meat that had fallen to the ground.

Now that the crow was free from its pursuers, it realised a great truth. "I lost the meat, but then, i have gained great freedom!" Similarly, if we drop our ego, our life will get released from tension. Just as the crow could fly at will in the vast sky, we too can soar in the beauty of life!

Vedas have four sections - Moksha Shastra, Artha Shastra, Kama Shastra and Dharma Shastra. The Moksha Shastra says: "Only when we drop our ego, do we realise the bliss that is within us!" The Artha Shastra advocates: "Earn money out of love; not out of greed". Greed can never satisfy us. The Kama Shastra advocates: "Convert sex into prayer". The Dharma Shastra says: "Let goodness, not ambition, be the foundation of life". Out of goodness, let ambition arise.

Our parents, siblings, spouse and children deserve our love and care. But while we do not share everything with them, we confide freely with a few friends. Over a period of time, a feeling of intimacy develops.

To help intimacy grow in your marital relationship; treat your spouse as your friend. Let there be transparency in your words and deeds. Some declare with pride, "I do not discuss office matters at home!" The reason given by couples is, "If i share office matters with my spouse, it might not be understood. It might lead to confusion and worry". This may be true to some extent. But it is not so difficult to overcome this simple hurdle, it is to prevent a wall rising between the two of you.
When you share your troubles, dreams or worries... what will a good friend do? He would just listen, letting you unburden yourself. He would create an atmosphere for meaningful sharing. Mother Teresa would say: "Don't spend your time in judging others; then you will not have time to love them!"

It is absolutely essential that such an intimacy exists between husband and wife. It is worth looking at an advice provided in Christianity to nourish the intimacy between husband, wife and children. "The family that prays together stays together!"
In married life, you have to compromise on certain issues which you may not really like or enjoy. One should learn to accommodate the other's likes and dislikes. Intimacy is bound to develop in the environment of such readiness to accommodate.
You receive as much as you give. One is more blessed in giving than in receiving. One should develop an attitude of giving in to the taste and interest of the spouse on less important issues.

You have to learn to like what you dislike too and even dislike what you like; so that you are above likes and dislikes. Then you will have likes and dislikes, instead of likes and dislikes having you! This is true mastery. Be a master of likes and dislikes.

The fallen Tomato Cart ......SUBROTO BAGCHI

2008-03-19T11:52:00.001-07:00

Not my post...but amazing article to read...

I pass through this very intersection every morning with so much ease. Today, the pace is skewed. There is a sense of disarray as motorists try to push past each other through the traffic light. The light here always tests their agility because if you miss the green, you have to wait for another three minutes before it lets you go past again. Those three minutes become eternity for an otherwise time-insensitive nation on the move. Today, there is a sense of chaos here. People are honking, skirting each other and rushing past. I look out of my window to seek the reason. It is not difficult to find because it is lying strewn all over the place. A tomato seller's cart has overturned. There are tomatoes everywhere and the rushing motorists are making pulp of it. The man is trying to get his cart back on its four rickety wheels and a few passersby are picking up what they can in an attempt to save him total loss. Though symbolic in the larger scheme of things, it is not a substantive gesture. His business for the day is over.

The way this man's economics works is very simple. There is a money lender who lends him money for just one day, at an interest rate of Rs 10 per day per Rs 100 lent. With the money, he wakes up at 4 am to go to the wholesale market for vegetables. He returns, pushing his cart a good five miles, and by 7 am when the locality wakes up, he is ready to sell his day's merchandise. By the end of the morning, some of it remains unsold. This his wife sells by the afternoon and takes home the remainder, which becomes part of his meal. With the day's proceeds, he returns the interest to the money lender and goes back to the routine the next day.

If he does not sell for a day, his chain breaks. Where does he go from here? He goes back to the money lender, raises capital at an even more penal interest and gets back on his feet. This is not the only time that destiny has upset his tomato cart. This happens to him at least six times every year. Once he returned with a loaded cart of ripe tomatoes and it rained heavily for the next three days. No one came to the market and his stock rotted in front of his own eyes. Another time, instead of the weather, it was a political rally that snowballed into a confrontation between two rival groups and the locality closed down. And he is not alone in this game of extraneous factors that seize not only his business but also his life. He sees this happen to the "gol-gappa" seller, the peanut seller and the "vada pao" seller all the time. When their product does not sell, it just turns soggy. Sometimes they eat some of it. But how much of that stuff can you eat by yourself? So, they just give away some and there is always that one time when they have to simply throw it away.

Away from the street-vendor selling perishable commodity with little or no life support system, the corporate world is an altogether different place. Here we have some of the most educated people in the country. We don the best garbs. We do not have to push carts; our carts push us. We have our salary, perquisites, bonuses, stock options, gratuities, pensions and our medical insurance and the group accident benefit schemes. Yet, all the while, we worry about our risks and think about our professional insecurity. We wonder, what would happen if the company shifted offices to another city? What would happen if the department closed down? What would happen if you were to take maternity leave and the temporary substitute delivered better work than you did? What would happen if the product line you are dealing with simply failed? In any of those eventualities, the worst that could happen would still be a lot less than having to see your cartful of tomatoes getting pulped under the screeching wheels of absolute strangers who have nothing personal against you.

All too often we exaggerate our risks. We keep justifying our professional concerns till they trap us in their vicious downward spiral. Devoid of education, sophisticated reasoning and any financial safety net, the man with the cart is often able to deal with life much better than many of us. Is it time to look out of the window, into the eyes of that man to ask him, where does he get it from? In his simple stoicism, is probably, our lost resilience?

Drop the ego for enlightenment(Swami Sukhabodhananda)

2008-03-12T10:06:00.000-07:00

Life is filled with truth, auspiciousness and beauty (satyam, shivam and sundaram) but our self is filled with a false ego. As long as the ego lives, we may not experience true beauty but our mind will be filled with dreams of expectations that define beauty in a subjective way. Ego is nothing but a self image of who we truly are.

This self image projects a reality defined by the expectations of the ego. When these expectations are not fulfilled, it creates its own resentments and regrets. These create a life of deficiency called 'samsara' and life becomes a movement from incompleteness to incompleteness.

If one increases one's awareness, which is a part of meditation, one realizes that resentment is nothing but a mental resentment to what has happened. It is a negative emotional fight of some unalterable past. Like a broken record one replays, relives the past injuries. Then they become mental constructs which project a subjective reality and hence we never see the objective reality. This mental construct act as a thermostat. To change the temperature of the room one has to reset the thermostat, to change the temperature of the internal room one has to drop the ego.

While listening to the chirping of the bird or music hear the foundation or the backbone of the sound. Look at the bird or the musician and see the formless presence in the form. Every form exists in a formless presence. A form is defined by the formless. It is only in the contrast the forms gets defined. This formless is the backbone of the form. Thoughts are moving. Any movement is change. Change happens in the changeless presence. Thoughts are internal sounds. See the soundless space while noisy thoughts are moving. When one deeply "sees" which is called 'Darshan' in Sanskrit, then one sees a formless, soundless, changeless presence as the backbone or foundation of life. This principle cannot be contained in any self image and hence self image is a prison in which most of us live. To drop this prison is enlightenment.

Tere Bin(without you) from album bus ek pal(just a moment)

2007-11-28T11:58:00.000-08:00

This is one of the most beautiful songs I've ever come across in youtube.
I really love it.
Can't put it in words.
It's deep.
Here it goes.Enjoy.
(Note:the translation too is not original.taken from some online forum and modified to make it better)

tere bin, main yun kaise jiya, kaise jiya tere bin
without you, how did I live, how did I ever live without you

lekar yaadein teri, raatein meri kati
with memories of you, my nights were spent.

mujhse baatein teri, karti hain chandni
the moonlight is talking to me about you

tanha hai, tujh bin raatein meri
alone are my nights without you

din mere, din ke jaise nahi
my days are no more like days

tanha badan, tanha hai ruh
lonely is my body, lonely is my soul

nam meri aankhen rahe
nor have my eyes remained

aaja mere ab rubaroo
come back now

jeena nahi bin tere
don’t want to live without you

tere bin, main yun kaise jiya, kaise jiya tere bin
without you, how did I live, how did I ever live without you

kab se aankhen meri, raah main tere bichhi
for so long are my eyes, laid on your path

kab se aankhen meri, raah main tere bichhi
for so long are my eyes,laid on your path

bhule se hi kabhi, tu mil jayen kahin
even by mistake sometimes, you might be seen somewhere

bhule na, mujhse baatein teri
I can’t forget, your words

bheegi hai, har pal aankhen meri
my eyes are always wet

kyun saans loon, kyun main jiyun, jeena bura sa lage
why should I breathe, why should I live, living feels wrong

kyun ho gaya tu bewafa, mujhko bata de wajah
why did you become faithless (in me), tell me the reason

tere bin, main yun kaise jiya, kaise jiya tere bin
without you, how did I live, how did I ever live without you

The Opinion You Form Is Always Relative

2007-11-22T20:16:00.000-08:00

If you truly respect sacred teachings, it is necessary to practise than merely preach. Among the beautiful teachings of Jainism is Syat Vaada. Syat Vaada says everything is relative and nothing is absolute.

For example, if one is practising Syat Vaada, and he hears someone say that a person is stupid, then he will say his stupidity is relative and not absolute.

This is because they believe that nothing has absolute characteristics. Our perception is always influenced by various factors. So whatever opinion we form of any person or thing can only be subjective or relative.

When an opinion is formed of a person, the question to be asked is: "Is it absolute or relative?" Whenever you form an opinion of others and consider it as absolute, then you stop seeing the person as a flowing being. Nobody is static, everyone is a flowing being.

By forming an absolute opinion of someone, you are destroying the basic quality of an individual as a flowing being. How does this concept help in our daily lives?

To me the quality of our life depends on the quality of our relationships. Keeping the perception of our relationship relative is keeping it open. Being open gives ventilation to life. If someone says Mr X is stupid, then he is not practising Syat Vaada. But if he says, "As far as i know, Mr X is stupid", then he is not labelling the person and at the same time validating his perception, and being open to other variables which do not make the other person stupid.

So often, we are prisoners of our own knowledge. So by saying "as far as i know", i am not making my knowledge as absolute and at the same time not deleting whatever i know and being open to other variables.

In this process, i am setting myself free and others free by not labelling the other. We label others and see only the labels and not the persons. This is an ignorant way of living. A wise person creates happiness around and an unwise one creates unhappiness. Practising Syat means 'up to a point'. If i can make statements like 'up to a point this person is bad', then i am allowing myself to see beyond my limiting perception. Any person is bad up to a point. Even a thief is bad up to a point, but he will do good acts for someone he cares for. So how can we say that the thief is bad in absolute terms?

This principle can be applied as 'to me'. In our perceptions and in our opinions of others, we could tell ourselves that 'to me' a person is bad and not that he is bad in absolute terms. Such a perception is more factual. We suffer in life for we make absolute statements about others and ourselves. We can set ourselves free and others by practising this principle, which says 'maybe' for things are relative. When we operate on a relative plane, we are open to other possibilities.

Creativity happens in the space of openness. When we are open, we see opportunities. There are far more opportunities than we think. When opportunity knocks, a wise person is open to opportunities, whereas an unwise person complains. So openness is a great virtue and this is the result of the practice of the principle of Syat Vaada.

Discourse: Swami Sukhabodhananda
www.prasannatrust.org

Good And Evil Are Relative Concepts

2007-11-22T20:09:00.000-08:00

Evil has no absolute existence of its own. The Bhagavad Gita says: "The good will never perish; evil can never exist". Evil doesn't exist as a separate entity; it is only an appearance. As such, it has only a relative, not absolute, existence. Just as darkness does not have an existence; it is not an entity or a substance but only a lack of light. In the same way, evil is simply lack of goodness. Moreover, according to the Puranas, even the demons finally merge into God: Ravana dies and merges into Rama.

This approach avoids the dilemma about evil and the omnipresence of God. Most religions are of the view that God is Omnipresent, Omnipotent and Omni-scient. If God is Omni-present, then there is no place for evil to exist outside God. If you recognise separate existence for evil, then you have to forgo God's Omnipresence. If evil is another power that is outside, or challenging God's power, then God is not Omni- potent. If He is not Omnipresent and Omnipotent, He can't be Omniscient. God loses his essential qualifications to be God if evil exists as a separate force.

Vedanta holds that evil cannot exist outside God, because God is the material cause of the universe. The example is of the spider weaving its web from its saliva. The spider, the cause, is not different from its web, the effect; just as Brahmn is not different from the universe.

Islam considers that everything is God's, but does not consider God the material cause of the universe. This basic philosophical difference means that according to Islam, evil can theoretically exist outside God. But if God is not the material cause of the universe, then Vedanta would hold that it is impossible for God to possess the essential qualifications of omnipresence, omnipotence and omniscience.

Vedanta discards a separate existence for evil and considers evil to be only a relative viewpoint. For example, poison is generally considered to be bad; but it is also good in a certain context: many life- saving drugs are poisons. Likewise, vitamins may be good, even lifesaving; but consumed in excess they can be fatal.

Therefore, good and evil are only relative. All is an appearance, including evil. And the enormous positive energy gene-rated in you can make you go beyond evil and see the truth as advaita, as the one non-dual reality. Sufi saints had to go through great ordeals in making people understand this principle.

Advaita philosophy is close to quantum physics. For both systems, the basic proposition is the same: that the universe is made up of one substance. In this sense, only a scientist can understand the true Vedantic concept of divinity. Vedanta says that God is energy and intelligence, and that the world, which is matter, is nothing but a part of God.

A scientist also knows there is nothing absolutely good or evil in existence. Every-thing is relative. Whether it is a poisonous metal such as mercury or lead, or a vitamin, the scientist does not assign any predetermined moral value to it. He just knows them as they are; that they are useful in different places for different purposes. Usage alone makes something good or bad. Therefore, Vedanta's approach to evil, as well as its concept of divinity, is consistent with scientific thought.

Discourse: Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

The Secret Of Nurturing Beautiful Relationships

2007-11-22T20:04:00.000-08:00

What is the basis of a relationship? Why do we need relationships?

Whatever the nature of the relationship, the fundamental aspect is, you have a need to be fulfilled. The needs may be physical, psychological, emotional, social, financial or political. If those needs and expectations are not fulfilled, relationships will go bad.

These needs have arisen because of a certain sense of incompleteness. People are forming relationships to experience a certain sense of completeness within. Life is a complete entity by itself. So why is it feeling incomplete? And, why is it trying to fulfil itself by making a partnership with another piece of life? Because we have not explored life in its full depth and dimension. Besides, there is a complex process of relationships as such. There are too many expectations.

Especially in the man-woman relationship, the expectations are so unrealistic that even if you marry a god or a goddess, they will fail you. But if you understand what the source of these expectations is, you could form a beautiful partnership. People's expectations are changing as their percep-tion and experience of life is changing, but they are not changing at the same pace. Relationships become a source of great conflict. More conflict is happening within homes than anywhere else.

If you try the management approach there is no way you can gauge it 100 per cent. If you try to mind-read the other person and constantly try to fulfil expectations, you will become a wreck.

Fundamentally, you are seeking a relationship because you want to be happy, joyful. Or you are trying to use the other as a source of your happiness. If you are forming relationships, trying to squeeze happiness out of somebody and the person is trying to squeeze happiness out of you, this is going to be so painful.

But if your life becomes an expression of your joy, not a pursuit of happiness, then relationships will be naturally wonderful. Shifting your life from the pursuit of happiness to an expression of joyfulness is what is needed for relationships to really work.

Right now, your body, mind, emotions and on a deeper level, your very energies are made in such a way that you still need relationships. If your body goes in search of a relationship, we call this sexuality. If your mind goes in search of relationships, we call this companionship. If your emotion goes in search of relationships, we call this love. If your energies go in search of relationships, we call this yoga. All these efforts are just to become one with something else, because somehow being who you are right now is not enough.

Suppose you are very joyful or loving and your life energies feel very exuberant, you feel a certain sense of extension. What does it mean? First, what is it that you call as 'myself'? What is the basis for you to know 'this is me and this is not me'? Right now, whatever is within, the boundaries of your sensation, you experience as 'myself'.

Yoga is about this for the word itself means 'union'. Whatever is the longing behind any relationship, you will never really know that oneness. But if you experience all this life around you as a part of yourself, the way you exist here will be very different. Relationships will only become a way of looking towards the others' needs, not about your own because you have no need of your own anymore.

Once there are no compulsions within you and everything that you do becomes conscious, relationships will become a true blessing, no more a longing, no more a struggle.

Satsang: Sadhguru

http://www.ishafoundation.org

Know The Accidental And The Essential

2007-11-22T19:55:00.000-08:00

Life has two layers: the essential, and the accidental. The essential is never born, never dies. The accidental is born, lives and dies.

The essential is eternal, timeless; the accidental is just accidental. We become attached to the accidental and we tend to forget the essential. You become attached to money but money is accidental. It has nothing to do with essential life.

You become attached to your house or car, spouse, children and relationships. Relationship is accidental; it has nothing essential in it. It is not your real being. You have become attached to 'my' and 'mine' - to possessions. And you have completely lost track of your being. You have completely lost track of 'I'.

'My' has become more important. When 'my' becomes more important then you are getting attached to the accidental. When 'I' remains more important and 'my' remains a servant, then you are a master. Then you live in a totally different way. Using the word 'I', in an absolutely non-egoistic sense it means your being. The accidental man lives on the periphery.

The essential man remains centred. You create a world of illusions around you. You get attached to things which are not going to be with you when you die. You go on being identified with things which are going to be taken away from you. Become more and more essential and less and less accidental. Only that which is eternal is true; only that which is going to be for ever and ever is true. That which is momentary is untrue. The momentary has to be watched and not to be identified with. This game of 'my' and 'mine' is an absurd game - but this is the whole game of life. This earth was there before you ever came here, and this will be here when you are gone.

The diamonds that you possess were there before you ever came here, and when you are gone those diamonds will remain here - and they will not even remember you. This game of possessiveness is the most foolish game there is - but this is the whole game. People who become certain about the accidental are going to be frustrated, their certainty is going to create much frustration for them.

Their certainty will create expectations, and they cannot be fulfilled - because the universe is not there to fulfil your expectations. It has its own destiny. It is moving towards its own goal. It does not care about your private goals. All private goals are against the goal of the universe itself. The essential man comes to know, to feel, that 'I am not separate from the Whole and there is no need to seek and search for any destiny on my own.

Things are happening, the world is moving. There is no need for me to make any struggle, any effort; there is no need for me to fight for anything. I can relax and be'. The essential man is not a doer. The accidental man is a doer. The accidental man is, in anxiety, tension, stress and anguish, continuously sitting on a volcano - it can erupt any moment, because he lives in a world of uncertainty and believes as if it is certain. This creates tension in his being: he knows deep down that nothing is certain. When things are no longer important, only consciousness becomes important. When things are no longer significant, a new search, a new door opens.

Then you are not rushing towards the without: you start slipping into the within. The kingdom of godliness is within.

Excerpted from A Sudden Clash of Thunder. Courtesy: Osho International Foundation. www.osho.com